Wedding today. Glorious day. Sunny – one of the few English summer weddings I remember at which the guests did not get cold as evening progressed. Beautiful venue. Bride film- star beautiful- looked like Jane Fonda in Barbarella. Heavenly food. Booze flowing- (Actual actual Bollinger) Great company. All guests on sparkling form. But as the evening wore on, yours truly unable to stop surreptitiously weeping. Why? Such a happy occasion but for me at least, haunted by so many deaths and sadnesses in the various families. Could not help tears welling at odd moments throughout and snivelling under my hat and dark glasses in sympathy for the Dead. A touch too much Bolly peut etre? Or symptom of getting older and becoming revoltingly sentimental with it.
So much said about “Smiling down on the happy couple” and “Absent friends”.
I think the absent ones, especially those cut down relatively young would be saying, “Dammit! Why did I not get to see this day? To see my beautiful boy getting married?..etc .
I looked at another family member who’s child had died a long time ago but would have been same age as my child and the Groom. Even thinking about that I found incredibly upsetting. But she took to the dance floor looked radiantly, rven particularly happy. Life and soul etc. How people get over these things….the indomitable human spirit.
Then they played Jackson Five “I’ll be there”. Felt sad about that whole thing too young Michael Jackson’s voice piping out and all that has happened about that since. The early death the scamdal etc- real blubbathon.
The River Files 