riverfiles

Running up that hill

River Sprite’s homework last night

“I must lie in a darkened room with headphones on and listen to Kate Bush’s “Hounds of Love” album – apparently each track tells a story “

What fabulous homework

The cat sat on my mat…..

Good things about today.

2)Found a parking space for my car JUST outside work. A rare thing indeed.

1)Dont have to find and remember to wear my poppy as have done last 2 weeks.

3)Was not late for work.

But what of yesterday and the cat?

We were invited to a lunch with lovely, close(ish) friends that I had looked forward to for many weeks. New pair of leggings, new shoes as my 30 year old (yes- actually 30 years) Russell and Bromley courts had given out and toe come away from the sole irrevocably.

So.. all psyched, company of nice people right kit and sunny day only it all went wrong ….in my head at least.

Why?

It started with us being shown in to elegant drawing room, roaring log fire and I could see through to kitchen where table charmingly laid with best crockery and linen napkins. Only there was large cat was sitting upright on the place mat at the end of table. Undisturbed, un scolded, un remarked upon. Extraordinary! Soon one of tge guests would be sitting there…

Urgghhh. I love animals, especially cats but with its rear end firmly on a place setting? I was reminded of when the River Sprite cuddled our long suffering cat on her lap once in an upended position so it was belly up. “Mummy a little white worm has just wriggled out of his bottom” She announced. And so it had. Off to the vet for a beefed up course of wormer etc.

I tried to put that away and accepted an invitation to sit down on their beautifully covered, antique, french sofa. Only soon as I did, a horrid little dog jumped up beside me and leapt into my lap.

Double Urrghh! My new leggings! and dogs allowed on the furniture. I jumped up immediately and stood by the fire, “Naughty doggy!” they said, “get down off the furniture!” But when the next person sat down, they were joined by the odious dog too. Thing is it wasn’t even their (the host’s) dog. Belonged to a lodger.

All these things very minor but I felt inexplicably rattled. Then slowly slid down into the slough of Despond.

Wasn’t even drinking! Made best conversation I could, albeit woodenly, but by time we were shown to our seats and I had to sit where the cat’s bum had lately been positioned, I felt miserable.

What on earth is the matter? Went through the motions of being a good, animated and empathetic guest for the remainder of the lunch, and think/hope I pulled it off but felt I was mechanical in all responses.

What on earth? Must have been ambushed by the darkening nights. That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it..

Felt the floodgates were about to open and that I might burst into tears at any monute and for n9 reason.. but WHY?

Contact contact..

Tonight my grumpy, remote, surly teen let me do her hair. We tried an “up do” from youtube https://youtu.be/923YMiwJUWc

I realised it is the first time I have been permitted to touch, let alone do her hair for a good 5 if not 6 years. Perhaps more. As my grandmother used to say “So often you don’t know when youve done something for the last time”

Carried your child upstairs. Put on their glove to go out into a freezing day. Bathed them. Read them a bed time story. Combed and plaited their hair.

It has been, “Don’t touch my hair!” for so long.

I kept waiting for her to flinch, pull away and snarl But it didn’t happen. She let me do it. A good 15 mins of styling and me not being pushed away. A little tear came to my eye.

The very nicest thing about giving blood

It was my 20th donation. They have a new system of telling you where and when. This is so nice. On a very difficult day for very many reasons, this text made me smile.

Thank you so much for donating on 21-Oct. Your donation has now been issued to St Thomas’ Hospital, London. Every donation counts.

A little peace….

Sharp frost this morning. Car went “ping” at me as we stared. Temp at 3 deg.

Children bundled in car. River Sprite grumpy as ever. Face like a thunderclap. “Looking forward to school?” I ventured

“No!”

“Nothing about it? Nothing at all?”

“No”

She said the teachers were “Shit”

I said that was unladylike language and in any event, inaccurate. Lovely, sunny morning and everyone in a grump already as we pushed along the lanes.

Then Zoe Ball played “Nicole” “A little love”. Tears actually stung my eyes. I was transported back to my own teenage years. Sitting on the sofa, at home with my beloved Mother watching Nicole with her marvellous, fuzzy 70s hair* strumming the guitar to win the Eurovision song contest with this song, in her native German. How everyone applauded when in her post win performance she sang a verse in English and then French.

Ambushed by such a powerful memory of the past and closeness with own Mother when I least expected it. Maybe it is the Queen’s funeral but feeling pretty tearful this week….

* Hair conditioner must have been in its infancy in those days and hair straighteners were yet to be invented…….

Lyrics.

A little loving, a little giving
to build a dream for the world we live in
a little patience and understanding
for our tomorrow – a little peace
a little sunshine, a sea of gladness
to wash away all the tears of sadness
a little hoping, a little praying
for our tomorrow – a little peace
I feel I’m a leaf in the november snow
I fell to the ground, there was no one below
So now I’m helpless alone with my song
just wishing the storm was gone

Summer hols scarcely underway and …..

I am so tired. In fact th

e word “Tired” barely covers it. Does anyone else feel like me?

Time flying…and life on the ocean wave

Family Sailing week commenced today.

Must be there 0900hrs. “All children into wetsuits prior” trumpeteed the specially set up Whatsapp group. Time and tide waits for no man. Damn early for summer hols I say. Harumph.

On the approach to clubhouse we witnessed the uncomfortable spectacle of a child lying on the grass, leg raised in the air and 2 women tugging at a wetsuit which stubbornly refused to move up the limb. The women were grimacing one actually sweating with the effort. We could not see the child’s face. Poor lad.

Had to pay in car park as lost our membership pass, sent out in Feb, between the windscreen and the fascia thing of car. Took it to senior car dealership in the County to attempt extrication but they said it would interfere with airbag.

A gorgeous Swallows and Amazons day nonetheless

Oilseed…..er….oilseed…r…r…”I don’t feel comfortable using that word..”

All of our county, currently ablaze with this gorgeous, brilliant thing….One of the River sprites could not say that word after latest PHSE lesson. Hence Blog title.

The untouchable in the garden.

Disconcerting encounter on the river bank with our Bnb guest tonight.

She is getting over Covid (very recent) and suffering “extreme” tiredness. This is impacting on her holiday. Ability to walk, explore etc much compromised. She is youngish. How disappointing.

“Oh dear, poor you. You did have all 3?” I say.

There is a slight smile. A significant pause “vaccines I mean?”

“No – I did not want to take the vaccine” I gasped and and a lively, very lively, encounter ensued. Riverbank, twilight. Ducks, primroses and fading birdsong. She feels a “wider discussion should be had” and that the “unvaccinared are being bullied marginalised”

“Gosh I hope so. Hope they feel like worms” I nearly said. Bit my tongue on that and did not say what I really wanted which was that we may not have accepted her had we known. Tried to be civilised. Concluded by saying, “we will just have to agree to differ”

She looked cross. Went on her way saying huffily “have a nice evening.”

Here’s hoping we don’t lose our superhost status over it….